Sunday, April 11, 2010

Petty Actions

We all have a way of becoming petty...  wether it's looking at someone else and pulling apart how they are dressed to comparing their knowledge to yours and seeing them as inferior because of something uneducated they said.  Pettiness is everywhere and comes out in everyone.  Chose to accept it or not, it's true!

While talking to my friend Jules the other day, we vented about all things stressful in our life and talked of relationships.  We discussed how you sometimes just know a relationship is over but can't end it.  I brought up an example of a guy I dated back in undergrad, who wasn't the right guy but despite my attempts to end it, he always found a way back most likely due to it being long distance and the fear of being alone.  Now when I finally did end it, there was drama and lots of it.  And for several years, there was petty dislike of each other.  Two years back, he had found me on an internet site and we let bygones be bygones.  I was happy that he had managed to turn his life around, found his perfect mate and was starting to build his future.  Then last fall I came to find out this guy died suddenly.  I was in complete shock!  He was only 30, had just gotten married not even two months before, bought a house, adopted a dog...was starting his life!  What makes everything worse about his sudden death (possibly an aneurysm) is that he left his new wife completely devastated.  She found her soulmate and suddenly lost everything in an instant.  There will be no children, no walks in the moonlight, no growing old together.  Every plan they made, every future possibility with him was ripped away in a moment.

When Jules heard all of this, she was shocked.  She never knew the guy but none the less felt the grip of his story and how precious life is.  To be truthful, you never know what will happen to you and when.  With how sudden you could die from a condition that may never be diagnosed, it seems pointless to be petty.  Why grumble about someone not being who you wished or wanted them to be but accept them for who they are.  Why hold grudges because someone didn't do what you wanted or hurt you in the past.  What's done is done and can not be undone.  Despite this, many people still continue to be petty...  maybe because they haven't been enlightened or have forgotten an eye opening experience they had.  For them I feel sorry as there is more to life than pettiness.

My re-enlightenment via Jules has me saying to myself that I need to just let go of my stress and things that worry me.  Why worry about the deoderant being discontinued or the fact that my teeth aren't as white as they could be and focus on the important things such as relationships, friendships and getting this PhD finished.  There's no need to be irritated about missing dyes or buffers in's all inconsciquential in the greater scheme of things.  As the old saying goes "Carpe Diem" aka "Seize the day" or in laymen's terms "Life life to it's fullest!"

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