Tuesday, July 6, 2010

That Wedding Thing...

Twice in the last week, I've referred to our wedding as "that wedding thing".  It's not that I'm not looking forward to the wedding and that I'm not terribly excited, it's just that the wedding is kinda like a black hole. Once you're stuck in it's gravitational pull, you get sucked in with no hope of escaping.

See my problem has nothing to do with the wedding but with the large amount of organizing it takes to plan an event that's hosting 200 people.  Every time I turn around there's something that still needs figured out.  We are just 2 months and change out with items such as the catering and flowers aren't quite pinned down to my liking.  And we have the invite ordeal as I wanted to send them out at 4 mo but I am still on the verge of finishing them...  hopefully by the end of this week!  The registry needs reevaluated before the invites go out as we did that 3 months ago and future hubs needs to get his tool registry at Sear's set up.  Additionally, I keep getting asked about when the bridal shower will be.  Um...  I don't know!  Ask my sister, aka my MOH, who is supposed to be planning it.  Oh wait, she's dropping the ball on that despite being laid off.  Ugggg!  I still have to have my first dress fitting but need to find the shoes before I can do that.  The groomsmen still haven't gone tux shopping.  And during this whole time, I still have PhD dissertation work to be doing that is a little more important than the wedding if I want to graduate next year.  *Pulling Hair Out*  Plus for the last month we've been dealing with future hubs grandma being in the hospital and now moving her into an assisted living home.  It seems like we can't get a break of any sorts to just relax and it's all wearing us both to exhaustion.  And when I keep being asked by friend's and family questions such as  "How's the planning going?" or "Are you getting excited?", I just want to look at them in a worn out gaze and say "Seriously?  If you must know it's a hell I never want to deal with again.  I don't have enough time to do everything and well...I'm letting somethings that I should be doing (such as housework) fall to the wayside as I don't have time to do my PhD work, wedding planning, cleaning and sleeping."  Or I suppose I should nicely tell them..."It's very stressful and I'd like not to be asked about it again unless you are offering man power to do one of the projects I need done. *begging grin to whomever I'd be telling this*"

Because of all this stress and anxiety, the wedding no longer feels like a wonderful thing but this enormous purple elephant following us around.  I want to be able to hit the fast forward button and magically have it be the wedding day.  I don't want to know how it got done... I just want it to be done...  the flowers, the decor, the gifts, the planning... all magically done!

But as I don't have a magic remote...  it shall remain "that wedding thing" until that day in September.  I know I'll look back and smile even though I'm beat down tired right now.  =)  And I suppose that once we get these invites mailed this week, I will breathe a sigh of relief before the next project begins.

Anyone else find themselves so overwhelmed by their wedding that they started to refer to the wedding in a less than favorable manner?

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